Ok so I'm kinda depressed actualy really depressed not really sure why I feel like I need some one to talk to but not any of you no offence maby its that I'm looking for something that dosent exist. But as always I have hope I don't know why I'm going to school tomarow I probably wont. I can't even get threw a stupid movie with out wantin gto die and its a fuckin movie not my freekin life. I seem to over compensate for my pain with words I know every one notices most of you are actualy nice about it just going on and on about stupid shit just beacuse I'm tired and my heart hurts and I feel completely ignorant. I'm over Jeremy now but now I'm just empty before I could be mad at him or be happy to see him or get a hug or even just talk but now that thats gone its just a void nothing there nothing to wory about or to get butterflys over just nothing all I really want is to be held by some one I love and to be inspired. I started thinking of my childhood again (not a good sign) there are so many things I've never told you guys not bad things but the few happy times when I was young Things I had foregotten I didn't tell you because they were really rivate or any thing but it feels like a privilage that I don't just want to give to every one because chances are that in a week you'll forget it any ways and I meen its not your fault its just that these memories arent important to you the way that they are to me.